I've noticed that while I think you have Fenris's voice down pretty well, there are a few things that you could keep in mind. This is just from first impressions after reading through his entry.
I've noticed you used far more contractions with Fenris than necessary. Not that he never uses them in his speech, but Fenris is a very careful speaker. He likes to speak clearly and emphasize his words somewhat, so he's more likely to say "I am" than "I'm", "they are" than "they're", etc.
Another thing I noticed was this tendency to have him hesitate or trip over his words, most notable in his thread with Molly. He does get flustered, especially if Hawke is piling compliments onto him, but he is usually a pretty collected and eloquent speaker unless there are slavers around, because fuck those guys. Like I said earlier, he chooses his words carefully, so I don't think he'd be that hesitant or flustered so easily.
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I've noticed that while I think you have Fenris's voice down pretty well, there are a few things that you could keep in mind. This is just from first impressions after reading through his entry.
I've noticed you used far more contractions with Fenris than necessary. Not that he never uses them in his speech, but Fenris is a very careful speaker. He likes to speak clearly and emphasize his words somewhat, so he's more likely to say "I am" than "I'm", "they are" than "they're", etc.
Another thing I noticed was this tendency to have him hesitate or trip over his words, most notable in his thread with Molly. He does get flustered, especially if Hawke is piling compliments onto him, but he is usually a pretty collected and eloquent speaker
unless there are slavers around, because fuck those guys. Like I said earlier, he chooses his words carefully, so I don't think he'd be that hesitant or flustered so easily.