I don't know PJO at all so don't have much to say about Leo (although I love Temrer's CR with him so \o/), but MARIUUSUUU
Honestly, I think you're doing a great job with him! His reaction to Cosette's disappearance is definitely in-character for a guy whose response to hearing Cosette was moving to England was to head to the nearest barricade, and I love that you write his awkwardness and introversion in a way that makes him really interesting to read.
As far as crit is concerned, I guess giving him something to do that he can really care about would be a good way to transition him out of mourning for Cosette? Even accidentally--I mean, this is also the guy who headed to the barricades to die but ended up getting really into it, haha. He probably needs to find something to do that will hold his interest long enough to draw it away from Cosette's Not Being There, and after that--we'll see!
Re: Chiqui | Marius Pontmercy and Leo Valdez
Honestly, I think you're doing a great job with him! His reaction to Cosette's disappearance is definitely in-character for a guy whose response to hearing Cosette was moving to England was to head to the nearest barricade, and I love that you write his awkwardness and introversion in a way that makes him really interesting to read.
As far as crit is concerned, I guess giving him something to do that he can really care about would be a good way to transition him out of mourning for Cosette? Even accidentally--I mean, this is also the guy who headed to the barricades to die but ended up getting really into it, haha. He probably needs to find something to do that will hold his interest long enough to draw it away from Cosette's Not Being There, and after that--we'll see!